CALLED: brave beautiful soul

Friday, July 01, 2005

brave beautiful soul

I just heard about this person today, and was very moved by her story. Actually I only know the bare outlines of it: she's Malay, but goes to church despite her parents' being against it. And she is HIV positive.

I do not know her name, because my friend said she couldn't divulge it. Lord knows why. But I didn't ask because I guess such things are rather sensitive in nature. I just think this girl, whoever she is, is really brave and strong. I suppose she probably thinks she is far from it, especially at those horrible times, but she is. So young, and already so much gone through. I ought to hang my head in shame. Who am I to complain about the state of my life? I am healthy, my family is not filthy rich but we are financially stable, I have the chance to further my education. I have 2 lovely sisters - not biologically related but by the blood of Christ - and I have several close friends who have stuck with me through these rather trying years. My parents love me, albeit imperfectly. I have Jesus. Many times I've compared myself to others, and felt lacking. Forgetting that there are many who have much less and yet face life bravely.

I am going to write this girl something to encourage her. =)

I went to Liz's house for her 20th birthday celebration. Extremely tame, no cake smearing or throwing people in the pool or anything (like Mona's 21st =P), but we did have some white wine. I only had a little - I had to go right after they finally got the cock out of the bottle. There wasn't any cockscrew in the house. Anyway, I don't really like wine, or champagne even though it's supposed to be sweeter. Cocktails are more up my alley (the Singapore Sling at Gallery Hotel! YummY). Though I only drink once in a blue moon, mind you! Please don't drink if you're underage, and please don't get yourself drunk ok. I used to wonder what kind of drunk I'd be - would I be the happy drunk, the mad one, or the sad one? Or would I just pass out? Now I've resolved never to get myself drunk. This is because when we were in Europe my dad had some last night and he snored so loudly the entire night. It was really annoying, and he wasn't even anywhere near drunk! Enough to put me off the notion of getting myself drunk just to satisfy my curiosity, though. Besides, I don't wanna end up blurting out anything I shouldn't or puking all over the place and getting a massive hangover the next day. And waking up in my own puke, as a friend did once. Gross.

Digressed. Anyway, I enjoyed myself. Saw Liz's younger bro, whom I've not seen in years. He looks more like her (and much better!!) now that he's fleshed out. Used to be so skinny. I missed her house, I remember the times I spent (and slept) there. Everything's still more or less in the same place, which is good. =D Liz is going back to Indo on Sunday = but there is still the phone, and holidays. It's funny how I've known some people since almost forever, and now we're all doing different things, taking different paths. Yet it's comforting to know that there are some people who will always be a part of my life, no matter which part of the world they end up in.

And for 3 days now I've not felt sleepy at all during the day! In the past there'd always be some times during the day (for eg. soon after lunch) where I feel horribly sleepy and have to struggle on through the haze. But for 3 days now! I've not felt this at all. It feels awesome. It could be because of the recent, very good news I got that's buoying me, but thank God anyway, cos' all my strength comes from Him.

I feel a new sense of purpose in my life now, something to look forward to and fight for. And that's just wonderful.

posted by esther @ 11:12 PM

2 Comments:

At 1:57 AM, Anonymous said…

lol.. lucky 4 me that there was no cake smashing, dumping me into the swimming pool etc ^^ Anyway it was a v nice outing i had with u on the day b4 i left see u again *muackz
At 12:57 AM, esther said…

haha...so not happening leh. but ok lah, 20 only. see what happens when you turn 21!!! *evil laugh* LOL. i enjoyed myself too, see you in dec!! hopefully you'll be home for xmas!!