CALLED: Draft 3 and a poem

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Draft 3 and a poem

Yep, I've finished my third draft. Thank God manz. It is quite different from the second in structure. Frankly, when I got that email, I was disappointed by Wilfred's comments even though when I sent it what I really wanted was advice, not compliments. But the lack of any compliment, plus two lines he said: "avoid writing as if you were writing a summary (which is evident in certain parts of your essay). instaed, try to write with more critical analysis and support your analysis with examples." That was kind of ouch, especially the 'critical analysis' part. But he was right, really. I did realise that for quite a big part of my essay I seemed to be only summarising the points in this article, but was not sure what else to put in, so I left it at that. I realise that I have this problem, I have quite a bit of pride and it's sometimes hard for me to accept even contructive criticism, and coupled with my problem with inferiority (I no longer refer to it as 'my inferiority complex' because I've already 'disowned' it sometime back), can be quite devastating.

Also it brought back fears that I may not be able to get my credits after all, and that is a very scary and painful thought for me.

I was praying this morning when He spoke and I wrote this poem:

Was it Easy for Abraham?

Was it easy for Abraham I wonder,
When God to him said,
Give me your son Isaac,
Lay him upon the altar.

My son - my treasure, flesh of my flesh,
To be burnt upon the altar!
That which God promised and gave,
Now to be taken away?

What sense, what logic!
Yet all life from my Father comes,
All good gifts, blessings to reap -
To a frail old man He promises sons...

So Abraham obeyed in faith,
And in that moment of surrender -
His son was his again;
He learnt the extent of God's love.

Did Isaac know like I do,
That come one day the Father Himself
Would give His own upon the altar -
His own treasure, flesh of His flesh!

It wasn't easy for Abraham,
And it wasn't for the Father,
Who knows the hearts of all mankind -
Fathers, mothers, sons and daughters.

But even so the Father obeyed,
As did the Son.
And even as their hearts broke,
They broke the bitter yoke.

So to my Father I surrender,
Like Abraham to give my Isaac;
And to be the sacrifice myself,
Like Isaac upon the altar.

I once read a poem by Jill Briscoe in her book There's A Snake in My Garden about Isaac and Abraham too, only in her case she was Isaac. In my case, I think I am both Isaac and Abraham - my studies and desire to do well being my Isaac. In order to have my Isaac I must first be him - to offer myself a living sacrifice, and to to seek first His kingdom like Abraham, that I may have my desires fulfilled. In any way Isaac trusted his father and obeyed just like Abraham trusted his heavenly Father and obeyed Him. It's touching to think of it. Even though I am not a parent yet, I can understand (and this is only the tip of the iceberg) how a parent might feel in Abraham's situation. And to think that Isaac was a miracle given to him, a 100 year old man.

It's funny how I got a verse from within the story of Abraham, about how God promised to bless and multiply him. When I checked online, God had said this to Abraham twice, in both times he had to give up something - the first was when he was told to pack up and leave, the second is the Isaac incident. I told Pastor Monica about it and she said that perhaps that was what God was trying to tell me as well - that I had to first of all give Him my deepest desires before He can make good out of it.

So here I am having had an 'Abraham/Isaac' experience, and the thing is I didn't even think of the above exchange when the poem came to me. I think the most beautiful thing is when Abraham obeyed, God gave him what He wanted, and then provided the sacrifical lamb (literally a sheep that 'magically' appeared in the area in Abraham's time) Himself - (metaphorically) His own Son.

posted by esther @ 7:02 PM

5 Comments:

At 12:05 AM, "s0n|c'C@libr3,, said…

your poem is so nice... :)

I've hardly come across poems about God ..... except for the ones in the bible .. Its really something fresh :)

I couldn't really relate to the feeling of a father. But i could relate to the part about sacrifice. To put in tears, your very precious ... on the altar of sacrifice. It's going to cost us something dearly..

well..

Very inspirational. God bless :)
At 4:56 PM, esther said…

Hi Jason,

Actually a know a couple or more people who write poems about God! Haha. Thanks for saying my poem is nice. :P God bless you too! =)
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