| Monday, June 27, 2005 |
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There is this blogger with the same name as my cellgroup leader. The funny thing is I stumbled onto his blog through a link on the blog of a net friend. I'd hardly have expected to have found the blog of such an on-fire Christian on this friend's page, some more it was the first link. That was actually because' this friend arranges the links in aphabetical order lah. Haha. Anyway, I've been a voyeur on this fellow's page and I think his life is pretty neat. Very, actually. He does extremely well in his studies, has good relationships with friends and family. Which is la lot ess than you can say for me, really. The thing is, like me, he loves God a lot, and he serves faithfully in his church - on the worship team too, just like me.
I want my life to be like that. Victorious. Healthy. I don't want to live like a hypocrite anymore, talking about all the grace of God when my own life is like that. My Christian faith sometimes seems like a lie in the light of the evidence. And the world looks at such things. Heck, people who are less intelligent, and who don't have God, have got success. So why shouln't my life be as successful, if not more? The God who made the universe is having my back, hello. The God who has promised me blessing and multiplying, hope and a future. There's no reason that I should be living like that. Why should I settle for less? Why should I bow to the god of this world? Why should I admit defeat? Why should I give in, compromise?
I have a chance now, to start anew, to show my family and my friends and the world what it means to have God in my life. That He can make a world of difference. That He is powerful and mighty and loving and gracious. And not just harp on and on about His grace blah blah blah but having no fruits to show for it.
Watch this space people. I've arrived.
Also from now on, to new people I'll be known as Esther. For some reason I didn't have a Christian name when I was baptized. The past year though I've come to know about the book of Esther and her character, and I want to be like her too. A queen who chooses to live out her identity, giving all her fears to God. A beautiful, brave, smart lady with good people skills too, I'd say. If it feels weird to call me by that name, 'Qing Ying' is fine too. You know what 'Qing Ying' means? Fullness, celebration. A good name. :D So I must go now and live out what my name (well, names, now) means. =D |
posted by esther @ 12:07 AM  |
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