| Tuesday, July 06, 2004 |
| The Best Man |
Last night I forgot to add some things about my brother. We have this weird telepathy thing. More than once he has sent me an SMS when I was feeling really down and asked me how I was doing. Well, it's more on his side. =P One morning, though, I woke up somehow and saw that I had a new message. I thought his name in his head, and when I checked, it was indeed from him. I just knew. Funny.
Anyway on to the topic proper. A long time ago I wrote this letter to him, and in it I said that I want him to be my husband's best man, even though it's not up to me to choose. I said something like I hope he is really good friends with my husband so he will be the best man. Lol. Sarah is definitely gonna be the maid-of-honour. A very tall one! Lol! Well, I think there is such a thing as groomsmen too, so if not best man, then groomsman. He just finished reading the letter today (he lost it and found it again) and he said, "I want to be your best man!" At which point I thought, You can't be my best man cos' that would be my husband...it briefly occured to me that he might have meant it that way, whether he realised it or not. He also said that he loves me lots. Lol. Hmm this blog is getting really personal of late. But well. It's a tremendous joy and blessing and I want to share this with people.
He called me "gal" too, and it's funny. He didn't use to do that!
There's this Kelly Clarkson song my friend told me about. The chorus goes, "For a moment like this, some people wait a lifetime". I'm thinking this now. Well, this isn't a moment per se, but...a friend? Yeah. Some people wait a lifetime for people to love them as they are. What they don't realise is, Someone already does. That person is Jesus. And that when they find themselves in the house of God, they'll find themselves surrounded with people who love them the way Jesus does. My brother says he always remembers me in his prayers. If he is true to his word, and if he prays everyday (which I think he does) that means I'm on his mind everyday. That's so...wow. =) I never asked for this. Of course, being human, people still disappoint at some time or other. But Jesus is always there. I've had many lucid moments when I've realised this, and the feeling is indescribable. It just can't be put into words. For a moment like this, some people wait forever.
Like the time I was assured of His grace one morning...
Ever since becoming a part of the worship team, I've had to reach church by 9 AM instead of the usual 10 or latest 1030. At first it was quite a chore for me, as I have a bad habit of sleeping at insane hours. But I've really come to enjoy it. I'll wake up at 7 and while dressing and all I'd drink a cup of hot tea or Milo or honey to warm up and wake up. The whole process is very therapeutic for me, somehow. Then the long train ride to church, during which I'd put on my headphones and tune out to the world, tune in to God. I used to sleep on the train, but I've realised that when I do this, I wake up even sleepier and crabby, and that staying awake actually makes me more alert.
So one morning - it was actually Saturday that day. We had practice for a special series of services that day. I was on the train, not having memorised all my lyrics. So I was looking through them on the train. It was already quite sunny then. I was sitting at the side furthest from the train doors, and suddenly I realised that there were rainbows on my paper! It was some trick of the light shining through the window in the door and through another pane of glass beside me.
If you don't understand, rainbows are very significant to me. This is because God cut a covenant with Noah after the big flood, where He said that He would never again destroy the earth with a flood. And that whenever a rainbow appears, it is a reminder of this covenant. For me, a sign of His everlasting grace. Not to mention that rainbows are beautiful and rare here in Singapore. And there I was. God showed me rainbows on a sunny day. Rainbows not in the sky, but on my lyrics. |
posted by esther @ 2:26 AM  |
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